Retreat Reports: Koan (Gongan) Retreat

We publish selections from retreat reports written after Western Chan Fellowship retreats, to illustrate the range of experiences people go through as they investigate themselves in silent meditation. These reports are printed anonymously and may be lightly edited.

Retreat Report, Koan Retreat September 2022, a poem

Calligraphy for the character Chan

Planting a great oak at Shawbottom
and returning each year to say, “I did that”,
that would be something.
The sapling trees were ready in pots,
the spade…

Western Chan Fellowship CIO

Categories: 2022 , Poetry , Koan Retreat Reports , Anon

Shattering the Great Doubt, Crosby Hall, August 2017

Calligraphy for the character Chan

…Day two. Koan day. I eventually plumped for one that, rather arrogantly, I believed I could answer. Hah! Silliness. We sat, the Koan playing in my…

Western Chan Fellowship CIO

Categories: 2017 , Anon , Koan Retreat Reports

Great Doubt

Calligraphy for the character Chan

Koan retreats with the Western Chan Fellowship have become a staple part of my dharma practice over the past few years since I have found a connection…

Western Chan Fellowship CIO

Categories: 2013 , Koan Retreat Reports , Anon

Finely Tuned

Calligraphy for the character Chan

As I write this, two days after my return, I am fine tuned. My heart is brilliant, clear and unobstructed. Someone throws a ball for a dog, which…

Western Chan Fellowship CIO

Categories: 2012 , Anon , Koan Retreat Reports

Abide in the Unborn

Calligraphy for the character Chan

Two experiences come to mind from the retreat:

One morning as I walked outside the Chan hall, I observed 15 to 20 birds darting in and out of trees…

Western Chan Fellowship CIO

Categories: 2009 , Anon , Koan Retreat Reports

The Buddhas Do Not Understand!

Calligraphy for the character Chan

A monk said to the Master "The Buddhas of past present and future don't understand. Cats and oxen do. Why don't the Buddhas understand?" Master…

Western Chan Fellowship CIO

Categories: 2009 , Anon , Koan Retreat Reports

Everything In Its Place

Calligraphy for the character Chan

I approached the retreat with some trepidation owing to my being workmaster, my first time on a retreat of any size. Previously I had carried out…

Western Chan Fellowship CIO

Categories: 2006 , Anon , Koan Retreat Reports

Why? Why? Why?

Calligraphy for the character Chan

Physically, I did not find the retreat too difficult. Having regularly practised the one hour meditation sessions traditional in vipassana, sitting…

Western Chan Fellowship CIO

Categories: 1992 , Anon , Koan Retreat Reports

Where's the Trick?

Calligraphy for the character Chan

I was fortunate to be able to collect Shifu, Guo Yen Hse and Paul Kennedy from the airport. We broke our journey to Wales in Bristol in order to see…

Western Chan Fellowship CIO

Categories: 1992 , For Newcomers , Anon , Koan Retreat Reports

Who is Dragging this Old Corpse Along?

Calligraphy for the character Chan

Several times during my retreat at Maenllwyd I was reminded of the many weeks I have spent alone walking in the High Pyrenees. The aching legs, back…

Western Chan Fellowship CIO

Categories: 1990 , Anon , Koan Retreat Reports

A Moment in Dokusan

Calligraphy for the character Chan

Dokusan:

"I'm frightened!"
"How big do you feel?"
"Oh - small"
"How old are you?"
"Seven".
"Be kind to the little boy inside you. Go and look into his…

Western Chan Fellowship CIO

Categories: 1990 , Anon , Koan Retreat Reports

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