Dharma Library

Physically, I did not find the retreat too difficult. Having regularly practised the one hour meditation sessions traditional in vipassana, sitting for half an hour at a time is not much of a problem for me. And the exercises offered during the breaks between sessions were enough to get the stiffness out of my limbs. Alternating between sitting cross legged and kneeling also helped me avoid any…

I was fortunate to be able to collect Shifu, Guo Yen Hse and Paul Kennedy from the airport. We broke our journey to Wales in Bristol in order to see my family for lunch. As we were leaving and my wife was wishing us well for the retreat, Shifu said, in reference to the retreat, "It's a trick!"

"Yes," my wife replied, "But it's a very good one, and a very necessary one," looking pointedly in my…

The role of guestmaster at a Chan retreat entails the responsibility for ensuring the comfort of the participants and visiting Master, the availability of necessary supplies and the organisation of affairs to ensure the even flow of the retreat programme. Together with Chief Cook and the Retreat Disciplinarian the work of the Guestmaster maintains the background quality of a retreat.

When I…

from the "Sermons to the Stones and Trees" tapes, Summer 1991

"If you do these things for some time the treasure house will open naturally and you will enjoy it fully." These are the concluding words of a Soto Zen ritual. Remember: "The treasure house will open naturally."

In meditation, it is not that one has to work desperately hard to get somewhere. The practice of meditation should be…

The silence becomes very palpable, solid. The quality of experience has been turned up. My koan becomes very distant. What first seemed like a fence, close and restricting, now, has moved to the horizon and eventually disappeared.

Everything seems wrapped in a profound silence which becomes as interesting as the sounds from the distant hills. Things become soft, fine and gentle. They all happen…

If one is attempting to go into Zen deeply, to understand the relationship between one's mind and the universe, then it becomes important to turn over and over again, going backwards and forwards, backwards and forwards, many times over, the same refrain, the same theme. Not with the analytical intellect, nor with the mind of one who seeks explanation, but within the context of zazen, wherein…

Several times during my retreat at Maenllwyd I was reminded of the many weeks I have spent alone walking in the High Pyrenees. The aching legs, back neck and shoulders; the relentlessness of the load on my back; the near exhaustion and mental stupor; the gratitude for occasional breaks with their slow recovery of the determination to go on no matter what. The recurrent question in my mind "Why on…

Dokusan:

"I'm frightened!"
"How big do you feel?"
"Oh - small"
"How old are you?"
"Seven".
"Be kind to the little boy inside you. Go and look into his fear."

Back on my cushion, the little boy in me and I talked together.

"Why are you hiding?"
"I'm scared."
"Why?"
"Dad's going to beat me."

And as we talked it through, and I cried with fear, my heart went out to the little boy in my memory. I comforted…

After midnight, when the still streets
drip from the trees audibly soft leaves
and I smile to hear sleepy voices
silenced by a closing window's sound,
I take a match to an incense stick
and set bright the dark candle in my private shrine.

With six slow breaths the pillared flame
sets this brooding throne aglow
where, pivoted upon some silent thought,
the golden face spans inwardly
the space between the…

Arriving in the yard
I switch off the engine
and gaze at the view,
evening sun on the rolling hills
yellow fields, dark woods.
In the sudden silence
a buzzard mews,
distantly guiding sheep
dogs bark.

Entering the gate
I come home to my hermitage,
welcoming trees brood
and the old door creaks on rusty hinges
falling plaster needs sweeping from the floor,
softly on cold flags moisture gleams.

Lighting the fire
I…