Dharma Library

Twenty-four of us talked about ourselves, why we had come and our hopes for the coming week. 'Coming home' was a theme for many. My struggles on three previous Shifu-led retreats made it feel more like school camp. My hopes were to learn more about off-cushion practice and the second stage of Silent Illumination, to avoid my usual frustration and despair ... and to lose some weight.

My first sit…

I felt an immense sense of fear and trepidation when I sent my cheque in for my first WZR. Previous to this my record at sitting was about 12 minutes, during which I would usually get terribly restless and my ankles would hurt due to the amount of sport I have played. On the other side I had spent years devouring books on Buddhism and quite a few other ‘isms’ too. My father had always been…

Mahamudra Retreat February 1999, my Retreat Report

My practice at home had been going well. I had read 'The Yogins of Ladakh' shortly after it was published and had enjoyed it very much. I particularly found Tipun's Notebook revealing. Often I have found the words we use not useful for me in working out where I am in terms of practice (a karmic problem). But somehow the Notebook approached the…

I arrived at Maenllwyd, in the deepest despair I have ever known - the 'dark night of my soul'. Having been to an Introductory Chan Retreat a few months previously, I had some dim awareness that this was a place where I could safely be, that is, be allowed to be, in that dark night.

And indeed, I was in a place, and with people, who accepted my existence well before I could.

I had spoken to…

Akshobya

Dark light before dawn
no wind and in the silence
a fox barking on the hill;
suddenly in the candle lit room
the cold landscape unfurls
invisible rocks, burrows of badgers
trolling the turf for bulbs and insects
the starlit dome, dusk before dawn
Blue immensity.

Ratnasambhava

Sunrise, far to the SSE
almost at the point of turning
a midwinter sky lined by the tracery of trees,
northern thrushes…

This article is reprinted from Chan Magazine. Fall 1998, p32-35. Based on several lectures by Shih Fu, edited by Dan Stevenson, adapted for NCF by John Crook.

The Chinese term for practising Chan is ts'an-ch'an, which means to investigate, engage, or dig into (ts'an) the heart or living enlightenment of the Chan tradition. It is often said in Chan that the door to Chan is "no door," that the…

Some years ago in NCF No. 12 John suggested the possibility of establishing an organisation based on the work at and attenders of Maenllwyd. My initial reaction, and I suspect also that of many others, was something like "well, it could be all right, but I don't like the idea of the formalities and organisation and committees etc." It seemed a bit unnecessary as everything seemed to work out fine…

Pale light after dawn
Low clouds scudding over green fields
Weathervane - SSW

Nine cars
In the yard
Tathagatas

Welsh hills in June
Misty rain
Wet tents

Sunbeams at dusk
Reaching round the corner of the hill
Only this week the sun so far

Cutting the tall grass
goggle eyed frog leaps for safety
Sorry !

Round the temple chanting
Koonyam poussa koon yam poussa
Outside cuckoos calling

Morning mantra
Steadies
M…

There seems to be a question: 'Can I be enlightened if I'm not a monk/nun?' Possibly not often for lay people, but can Buddhist teachings and practice improve the quality of our lives - the answer is a resounding 'Yes'.

A lay practitioner is constantly faced with personal obstacles, disagreements, tensions and difficulties which can lead to days and weeks of self analysis or can be ridden over…

This was my first retreat of any kind and it was very difficult to start with the rigorous Chan approach. However, I felt very privileged to be accepted onto the retreat and I did not want to miss such an incredible opportunity to improve my practice. I undertook the retreat on the basis of intuition; it seemed entirely the right thing to do and the right time to be doing it.

Three years ago Zen…